Wednesday, March 24, 2010

Things I'd rather do than chew on a bacon flavored gumball:

Things I'd rather do than chew on a bacon flavored gumball:
  1. Watch the Twilight Series
  2. Drink liquid Crisco
  3. Cut off my eyelids
  4. Listen to disco music
  5. Listen to country music
  6. Swim in a sewage canal
  7. Kick my bare foot against a brick wall
  8. Watch Xanadu
  9. Eat a well-done steak
  10. Eat raw chicken
  11. Use a slab of raw pork as a washcloth
  12. Lick the edge of a piece of paper
  13. Root for Tx A&M, Tx Tech, LSU, or Florida.
  14. Go see a ballet
  15. Yoga
  16. Drive a minivan
  17. Misspell a tattoo with my wife's name on my forehead
  18. Become a Jehovah's Witness
  19. Watch a WNBA game
  20. Scrap off my taste buds with a microplane
  21. Sit in an airtight room with a bag of burning hair
  22. Take a bath with 1,000 snakes
  23. Pour dish soap over a bowl of ice cream
  24. Walk on broken glass
  25. Wash my clothes in wolf urine
  26. Eat a bowl of rutabagas
  27. Get stuck on the "Small World" ride a Disney World for 3 days
  28. Chinese water torture
  29. Drink dirty bath water
  30. Stick my hand in a blender
And that's about it.

1 comment:

  1. I have no comment to your odd anti-fetish, but what it did was make me think of sweaty meat. Now that's pretty disgusting.