Wednesday, March 30, 2011

Dear Bacon:

Dear Bacon,

It's nice to see you're doing so well. You're so popular these days it seems like everyone wants you to be part of their lives. Well to be honest I hope we will continue to meet on a regular basis. What's not to love about you? You're delicious, tasty, crispy, salty, and smokey. You always are nice around my friends like Burger, Eggs, Salads, Toast, Meatloaf, Chicken Sandwiches, Pizza, and so many other savory dishes.

However, the real reason I'm writing today is because I've noticed how you've started hanging around groups you should have nothing to do with and I'm concerned. The other day I saw you dipped in chocolate. CHOCOLATE! I've also seen you laying on top of cupcakes, cooked into cookies, sprinkled in ice cream and donuts, and so many other sweet dessert
s. This is not you! You're better than this! Look at you, don't you see what you've become?

You need to take a step back and evaluate who you are. Not on the surface but inside your delectable tasty heart. Get out of the spotlight and back on my plate with eggs and toast. You've sold out. You jumped the shark. YOU nuked the fridge.